Angry...

You have every right to be...

the glass wall

as if separated by a glass wall...

i see you...

you see me...

no words are heard...

no touch is felt...

hand against it...

as if to touch... to feel...

when one touch will ease the pain...

when one hug will dry the tears...

when all that's between is a thin glass wall...

... i want to smile again...

I miss making you laugh...
I miss making you smile...
I miss making you the happiest you've ever been...
I miss laughing...
I miss smiling...
I miss being the happiest I've ever been...
I miss being me...
I miss you...

...secret...

I don't know why I'm bothering to post... no one reads this blog... I guess it's just the need to get something out... even if the person it's intended for will never read it.

You may never know how much you hurt me. You may think the pain you feel is great... not as great as the pain you inflicted. I've never felt pain this great... I've never felt for anyone this much... to be given the happiest 2 months of my life... only to have it taken away in the most painful way imaginable.

Loss is never easy... specially when you know that it's the person's choice to want to leave, or at least want you out of their lives. The pain is worse than death, for at least death usually comes against the will of the people involved.

I should feel better now... I SHOULD. But I don't. It's been over a week, and all the things I do help me forget my pain for the moment, but only for the moment. I grieve, but it doesn't seem to help. What am I doing wrong? Why aren't things getting better?

...on happiness...

"I believe that the very purpose of our life is to seek happiness. That is clear. Whether one believes in religion or not, whether one believes in this religion or that religion, we all are seeking something better in life. So, I think, the very motion of our life is towards happiness..."- Dalai Lama

...on choices...

And once you lose yourself, you have two choices. Find the person you used to be or lose that person completely. Because sometimes you have to step outside of the person you've been and remember the person you were meant to be. The person you wanted to be. The person you are.

Rockestra II

AUGUST 18, 2006 8:00 PM at the Folk Arts Theater

The Manila Symphony Orchestra performs with

6CycleMind
Hale
Itchyworms
Updharmadown
Urbandub
and The Dawn

almost done

ran into a few annoying glitches... specially with Safari and IE (Firefox doesn't seem to give me any problems) but I was able to sort everything out already. Things seem to be functioning the way I want. Only time will tell if I got everything right.

bird brain?

Ok, was watching TV while working... and I just learned the most useless, albeit interesting, trivia. Crows drop nuts on the street to have cars run over them and crack them open. Now, if that isn't smart enough, the more interesting fact is that they only wait by crosswalks (they perch on powerlines) then wait for the crosswalks to turn green before hopping down from the powerlines to get the cracked nuts!

(Ok, enough Discovery Channel..)

senseless scribbles

Just testing the formatting of this text on my site. Took me a while, since I had this really strange code in my site that was causing problems in Safari and IE for Mac. Anyway, I got things sorted out and I'm just observing things right now.

My portfolio isn't up yet, I'm still too busy to work on that... hopefully I'll have some time by next week.